Dispatch from Lamar

Written by Tyler Hargraves

Another week has come and gone, and with its passing I am the slightest bit closer to returning to a life devoid of hurricane-related misery. I feel, by continuing to look forward to the coming weeks, I’ve been able to keep myself from being consumed by the recovery.

My life as a college student has continued to return back to its pre-Harvey levels of normalcy. This past week consisted of one midterm, and countless hours of studying for said midterm. Luckily for me, I did quite well on the exam, so my mind was able to rest for a short amount of time knowing at least I wasn’t failing. The school week did feel like it would take an eternity to end, even with several classes being cancelled.

Unfortunately for me, I had another extremely busy week involving my creative projects. I was responsible for several editing projects with the athletics department at Lamar University, a wedding video, and even a full day of shooting on a film set. To say my mind and body are completely and utterly drained would be an understatement. However, these are the endeavors that help to keep me sane, and also make certain my bank account actually has a dollar amount in it.

The past week wasn’t exceptionally different than previous weeks in regards to home recovery. The contractors continued to make progress on the drywall, and it shouldn’t be too long before the walls are fully restored. However, there was definitely a negative development this week in regards to our new cabinets. We are on a six-month wait list for our new cabinets to be built, so now instead of having brand-new wooden cabinets it looks like we are going to have to attempt to salvage the moldy cabinets we were fortunate enough to have not tossed into the debris pile to be hauled away.

There were a few moments this week where my mind did begin to wander, and linger on memories involving my destroyed home. They weren’t excessively long memories, rather simple flashes of moments. Lingering on these moments caused a hurt that can really only be described as spiritual. A resonating pain that shot beyond my body, and directly into my sense of being. That’s probably the hardest part about this recovery period: dealing with a pain which can’t be alleviated by medication or rest and knowing this pain will only go away through the passage of time.

For me, I hope the day will come when I can look back on this period of my life and view it as a step forward and as a positive moment in my growth as an individual that has enabled me to better comprehend this world, and everyone who inhabits it. I have a feeling this hope will become a reality. The only real question is how much more hurting I’ll experience until then.

Dispatch from Lamar will be a weekly feature in The Hawk.

About the author

Tyler Hargraves

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